On a recent trip to the library I headed to the fiction section and wandered aimlessly for hours… well… ok… minutes. I use a very scientific method in choosing which books to pull and read more about. That is, I look for the ones with pretty covers! Every once in a while, though, it’s the title that may draw my attention. And although you may roll your eyes, you must give me a break. I’m a 29-year-old (or 25 & 4, as I like to say) single girl thriving in Mormon Utah. A book titled “Rules of Engagement” quickly draws my attention. So, I pulled it off the shelf and started reading, and lo and behold, it was written by an LDS girl chronicling her experiences as a BYU coed. I knew I was meant to find this book.
Anyways, the book is basically a story similar to “The Singles Ward” but the author, Stephanie Fowers, is a fantastic writer. She put so many things into words that I’ve felt and known over the years. I enjoyed many good laughs. And I must, MUST share some of her words with you.
**Gentlemen, you might want to stop reading now or you’ll be rolling your eyes so much they might get stuck in the back of your head**
“Basically, this was a girl’s lot in my world: she had to plan like she was going to be single for the rest of her life, but she had to be ready for a major change if marriage happened to come along. Now lump that with my own personal flaws, and you had me. So, where was I because of it? I was firmly on the shelf; not just by Mormon standards, but by the world’s too. I was twenty-five with nothing to show for it, and oh, I had so many plans in the meantime. I wanted to be a rock star, a surgeon, an actress, a cop, a wife, a mother…oops, no, that’s a no-no. One must never admit they’re a female with maternal instincts, because that makes one less desirable and more vulnerable to attack.” (Pg. 9)
“You see, no matter how laid back they look, Mormon guys are different from any guys I’ve ever met. They’re scared of everything because everything means commitment. If a girl happens to show interest, it means she wants to marry him and it freaks him out. He won’t ask a girl on a date unless he’s ready to marry her, which freaks him out again. So then, when we get tired of waiting to be asked on dates, we ask the guy out instead, and guess who freaks out? Yep, every guy here would deny it, but it’s true. Mormon guys are overly sensitive. We girls have tried to fight this fear, but it just won’t die, and so we’re forced to play mind games by acting completely harmless with our interests hidden away until even we forget about them.” (Pg. 19)
Oh, there are so many more great quotes I could share but I wouldn’t want y’all to think I’m a guy-basher, cuz I’m not, contrary to how this post may come across. Basically, I think it takes a miracle for any relationship to work. Some relationships may require larger miracles than other, but I think you get the idea… as I’ve said before, I’m gonna need a miracle.
To sum up:
Fairy-tale endings have ruined me for real-life romance!
But I keep dreaming anyways!
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